When my sister was explaining the futility of my expectations

Her favorite line was, "You keep trying to use logic and reason to explain the world."


The echoes of my angry thoughts spun between my ear drums

"How dare you hurt me?!"

"How dare someone hurt me when I didn't do anything wrong!"

"How dare you expect me to be kind and rational when someone hurt me so terribly!"


It was a perfect spiral

That was only broken by guilt at my realization that I was hurting

the people I had promised to protect and teach

to be better

than I am.


Maybe if I spent more time thinking about the pain I cause others without intention

My intended outcomes would be more likely to occur


And once again I spiral


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