Ficlets and Ficly survivor, FicMom, and Mistress of Well-Intentioned Indecision and Goddess of Unrequited Love. @ElshaHawk @HawkandYoung
I hung up the phone, tears on my cheeks. Sniffling to get control of them, I knew who I had to call next.
"Miss Ann? This is Marie, Elizabeth's sister."
"Do you want me to get her for you?"
"No, Miss Ann, she's going to need some time off. I'm coming to pick her up from work now. Tell her to get her things ready. I'm sorry for the inconvenience but our dad was just in an accident."
"Oh, dear! Let me get her."
"No, I'm on my way."
Taking off work was a necessary sacrifice. I steeled myself for the fight I would receive from my sister when I arrived.
"Get in the car."
"Can't it wait?! How bad is he?"
"I don't know. We are going to find out. Get in."
"Are you sure? I mean I don't want to see him like..."
"Listen, I know you think of him as the Big Bad Wolf, but it would do you some good to see him vulnerable."
"I don't want to."
Tears sprang to my eyes. It shocked her to see them. I was always the older, stronger one. "I need you come with me."
She got in the car. "For you."
No prequels yet. Why not write one?
No sequels yet. Why not write one?
Comments (2 so far!)
Never sure if my suggestions are helpful or not. I feel like this story begins at "Get in the car." Everything before is important for you to know as the writer but that's the moment of action and allows for a lingering on the conversation or moment after the reveal.
- #3164 Posted 4 months ago
Good point! I just got the ideas out, didn't really edit myself.
- #3180 Posted 4 months ago
- Published 5 months ago.
- Story viewed 7 times and rated 0 times.
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