Why Are You Married?
Ficlets and Ficly survivor, FicMom, and Mistress of Well-Intentioned Indecision and Goddess of Unrequited Love. @ElshaHawk @HawkandYoung
The next time we'd scheduled a meet-up, my best friend's girl suddenly had a work emergency. She posted pics online of her out drinking with friends and my best friend, late, after work.
We rescheduled but I got sick, and while I got plenty of "that's too bad" messages, she posted pics of waterskiing with her beau.
Finally, after I'd given up trying to hang out with my own best friend, she rescheduled one of his events; a football party. You don't mess with Sunday football.
He met me at the bar for the big game. It was like old times. We cheered, we booed, we sipped our drinks and we laughed and ribbed at each other and I got to throw in a few choice negative words at his girl without getting him mad at me.
The bartender girl sidled up to me, stuffing her tips into her apron, "Why are you married?"
"I've been watching you all night. He really likes you. You like him. I never see your husband here. Why are you married? Are you staying together for the kids?"
"I love him."
Her eyebrows shot up.
Comments (2 so far!)
Minor correction in the dialogue when the bartender speaks. Just a few missing letters I think.
Observations: The bartender's pretty forward for being a nameless character. The throwaway line about talking trash about his girlfriend is begging to be more important. I'd either drop it for now and use it when it can be more fleshed out or flesh out the moment here. Since this already has a sequel, I imagine it's too late for much rewriting. I am surprised to find myself empathizing with the protagonist, usually this kind of thing isn't my cup of tea. Side question: Have you ever read The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo?
- #3161 Posted 4 months ago
Thanks for the editing notes, amended.
I think it's pretty cool that you are siding with the protagonist. That's like a victory for a writer.
And lastly, I've been meaning to read it, but haven't had the time.
- #3178 Posted 4 months ago
Inspired by (sequel to):
I talked to my boyfriend about my feelings of jealousy for my best friend's relationship.
"I get t…Double Date
- Published 5 months ago.
- Story viewed 13 times and rated 0 times.
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