An Innocent Fundraiser

"Well..." started Melissa, "the church is on fire, but the inside is still flooded to about waist level."

"Never again" said the monsignor with a heavy sigh.

To which he heard from the church's parking lot, "To be fair... the barbeque was a good idea in THEORY."

"And the children loved the ducks... up until the inferno, I mean." chimed in someone else the monsignor didn't care to hear from at the moment. He closed his eyes and started rubbing his temples.

Someone sneezed.

"I can't even..." he started again as firetruck sirens starting coming within earshot.

"Are the ducks going to be ok?" asked Billy with the innocence of a child even though he was 47.

There were audible quacks from inside before about a dozen mallards broke through one of the stained glass windows on the east side of the church.

"Yay ducks!" said Billy, who even though you wouldn't be able to tell from the last things out of his mouth, was the town mayor.

The monsignor whipped his head around and glared. "No more bake sales. Ever."